<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>#Kylodemption by idrilhadhafang</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24537112">#Kylodemption</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang'>idrilhadhafang</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars Sequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Fans &amp; Fandom, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anti Typical Behavior, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Ben Solo is a Mess, Chapter 13 Was Hard As Fuck To Code, Characters Writing Fanfiction, Christmas Fluff, Crack Treated Seriously, Darkpilot Flirting, Discussion of Racism and Online Drama, Dysfunctional Family, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Fusion of Star Wars Legends and Disney Canon, If DOTF Came Out Instead Of TROS, Inspired by Real Events, Kaydel Is Luke’s Daughter, Light Angst, M/M, Metafiction, Minor Luke/Mara, Nightmares, Occasionally Gets Fandom Critical, Past Child Abuse, Past Domestic Violence, Past Familial Estrangement, Past Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker, Phasma Is Ben’s Roommate, Phasma Ships It, Protective Ben Solo, Protective Poe Dameron, Rey is Poe’s Little Sister, Secret Identity, Skywalker Family Drama, Slow Burn, Social Media, Soft Ben Solo, by Ben’s grandfather, college drama, in june, loosely, online bullying, regarding Hux</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:34:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,992</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24537112</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After the disappointment of the most recent Galaxy Wars movie, Duel of the Fates, Ben Solo (KnightOfRen) collaborates with his sort-of rival Poe Dameron (DamnDameron) to write a Kylodemption-themed fix-it. What starts off as an ordinary collab becomes more.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Minor or Background Relationship(s), Poe Dameron/Ben Solo, Poe Dameron/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>The Darkpilot Aquarium</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Deal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/AquaWolfGirl/gifts">AquaWolfGirl</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Disclaimer: I own nothing. </p><p>Author’s Notes: For AquaWolfGirl, who gave me this prompt one or two years ago: </p><p>“DamnDameron and KnightOfRen are two of the biggest authors in the Galaxy Wars fandom. They don't really have beef with each other, but they're constantly competing. Until one day someone suggests they do a collaboration. Turns out they enjoy writing sex scenes together. Like ... really enjoy it. What started out as a fiery collaboration turns into something more the more chapters they write together.”</p><p>I hope you like it! Sorry it took so long. Also, I didn’t expect the Kiralo thing to creep in, but it made sense that at least some of the characters would ship it.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> The old woman on Dantooine smiled at the young woman coming to the abandoned Jedi Enclave, Force Sensitive kids in tow. “Hasn’t been anyone here in years. Who are you?”<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Kira, former Jakku scavenger, smiled. “I’m Kira.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Kira who?” said the old woman. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>“Kira Solana.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The lights went up in the theater, and even as Ben listened to the people clapping and cheering, he couldn’t help but feel like he was in a nightmare that would end at any moment.</p><p>“Um, Ben?” Tai spoke. “Are you all right?”</p><p>“Yeah, fine,” Ben said. “I’ll just...feel better when I get home.”</p><p>They talked on the way out, and in the car. Tai, bless him, was struggling to give Duel of the Fates the benefit of the doubt (because he was Tai), but Ben couldn’t help but wonder: had they come all the way for this? All the way for this waste of time and money?</p><p>“You know, I wanted Kylo to reunite with his mother and be happy,” Ben said. “Apparently, no. They had to turn him into a generic Space Battles villain because fuck consistency, I guess.”</p><p>“Well,” Tai said, “It was what, ten years? People change in ten years.”</p><p>“Not that drastically!” Ben said. “I mean, Kylo’s not Sidious; he’s not like mustache-twirly evil. And don’t even get me started on Kira and John; say what you will about Kira with Kylo, but she didn’t basically mind-trick him to make him forget a kiss or something.”</p><p>Tai grimaced. “Yeah, I’m sure that’s...questionable consent. I think that John and Kira had chemistry in TLJ, but that moment in DOTF...”</p><p>“Yeah. I mean, Kira wouldn’t do that!” Ben said. He sighed. “Fuck, DOTF was just so...disappointing...”</p><p>“I know,” Tai said. “I’m sorry, Ben.”</p><p>He dropped Ben off at the apartment he shared with Phasma Parnassos, and Ben told him to drive safely. Then Ben walked off. Suddenly, he couldn’t help but feel like an idiot in his Kylo costume.</p><p>***</p><p>It was when Ben got home that he flopped on the bed in his apartment that he shared with Phasma. Phasma raised an eyebrow. “You look like you didn’t have a good time.”</p><p>"The movie was on a bad acid trip,” Ben groaned. “It’s the only explanation.”</p><p>”That bad?” Phasma said. “I take it that you don’t want to talk about it?”</p><p>”I’m not getting out of bed for a while,” Ben said. </p><p>”I did warn you.”</p><p>”Phas,” Ben said. “You’re not helping.”</p><p>Checking Twitter didn’t really help matters either. People were pissed beyond belief, mostly people who had believed that Kylo would be redeemed. Some were pretty much we-told-you-so, but Ben had almost believed, when Kylo’s father had touched his face, that Kylo was going to come back. </p><p>Apparently, the director of this movie had gone “lol fuck it I don’t care”.</p><p>It was after Kylo posted his Tweet (which could be summed up in a GIF of Vader going “Nooooooo” in <em>Revenge Of The Sith) </em>that he saw a Tweet on his timeline that made him smile a bit. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
<p></p><div class="tw twBody"><p> </p><p> </p>
<p></p><div class="twUser"><p>Impulsive, Reckless and The Last Thing We Need Right Now
<span class="twHandle">DamnDameron</span></p></div><div class="twText"><p>I don’t want to go all “OMG angry critic!” on DOTF, but that seriously was the most bizarre movie I’ve ever seen in my life. #DuelOfTheFates</p></div><div class="twStats"><p>❤ 1.2 <span class="twTime">December 18, 2020</span></p></div><div class="twComments"><p>20K people are talking about this</p></div></div><p>Ben smiled faintly. There was something about DamnDameron that even though he was a competitor for Ben (who went by the name AKnightOfRen in fandom), Ben admired him. Ben had never seen his face (even his Instagram page was for his fanart instead of personal pics), but he was charming, charismatic, and generally pretty upbeat and kind. Ben wished he was like that, more than anything. As Phasma would attest, he wasn’t always easy to get along with. It was clicking on the Tweet proper that Ben saw one reply:</p><p> </p>
<p></p><div class="tw twBody"><p> </p>
<p></p><div class="twUser"><p>Certified Kiralo Trash<span class="twVerified">✔</span><span class="twHandle">theknightsbride </span></p></div><div class="twReply"><p>replying to DamnDameron</p></div><div class="twText"><p>That’s a mood. I was thinking, flyboy; that Knight of Ren guy doesn’t seem happy about it either re: Kylo. You could always collab with him?</p></div><div class="twStats"><p>❤ 4.6M <span class="twTime"> December 18, 2020 </span></p></div><div class="twComments"><p>30K people are talking about this</p></div></div><p>Ben groaned. TheKnightsBride (a.k.a. DamnDameron’s adoptive sister, whose fics were highly recommended in Kiralo fandom) really seemed to be reading Ben’s mind over the Internet. The idea of collaborating with the ever-talented, charming-as-hell DamnDameron, who had become something of an Internet crush of Ben’s? Obviously, it was too good to be true. There was no way in hell that someone like DamnDameron would even think of looking the way of someone like Ben. It was odd thinking that when your fics were pretty highly praised, but still... (Low self-confidence really could be a bitch, Ben thought)</p><p>And then a message in Ben’s Twitter inbox from DamnDameron. <em> Sorry about my sister, </em> the message read. <em> She really likes your work and mine, and she’s kind of a meddler.</em></p><p> Ben frowned. What exactly did DamnDameron mean by that? Still, he typed, <em> It’s okay. I was actually thinking...what if we did that collaboration? </em></p><p>DamnDameron typed back, <em> Giving the people what they want? 😉 </em></p><p>That wink emoji shouldn’t have made Ben feel as fluttery as he did. <em> Well, yes. And you’re talented. Really talented. You write Kylo really well. Especially that memory loss story you had. </em></p><p><em> Well, thanks, </em> DamnDameron typed. <em> He had potential. I mean, TFA was such a nuanced, complex portrayal of the character and DOTF just turned him into Snidely Whiplash.</em></p><p> Ben couldn’t help it. He laughed. Phasma walked in, smiled. “You seem to be doing better,” she said. “Your boyfriend posting again?” “He’s not my boyfriend, Phas. DamnDameron’s my...friendly rival.”</p><p>“Don’t rivalries often lead to being boyfriends?” Phasma joked. </p><p>Ben sighed. “Phas, this isn’t a slashfic!”</p><p>“I’ll just leave you alone,” Phasma said with a knowing smile.</p><p>She walked out. Ben sighed again and typed back, <em> Yeah. Kylo meant a lot to me. </em></p><p><em> I was in his place once, </em> DamnDameron typed. <em> Well, without the killing people part. Long story. </em></p><p>Ben frowned. It was unthinkable, the idea that someone as fundamentally sunny as DamnDameron could be in that position once upon a time.</p><p><em> I’m sorry, </em> he typed.</p><p><em> Not a problem. I mean, that’s why I get angry at the antis. It’s like they think they’re better than the rest of us, </em> DamnDameron typed, <em> And they’re willing to let Vader off the hook for killing kids and choking his pregnant wife to death and other stuff, and General Karath for wiping out a whole star system. Ugh, sorry; I don’t like being negative. </em></p><p><em> No, go on, </em> Ben typed.</p><p>
  <em> I think Kylo has done shit things. I mean, DOTF shouldn’t be canon, but it is. Just for instance. But there was good in him too. Sparing Sam at the village when he could have turned him in, his interactions with his dad...he’s not a fluffy bunny, but he’s not like Sidious or something. Which is another reason DOTF should be remade. </em>
</p><p>Ben nodded. <em> Your fics seem to have strong themes of redemption. </em></p><p>
  <em> My sister tends to say that I’m a marshmallow. 😉 </em>
</p><p><em> I say we need more of that, </em> Ben typed. A beat.</p><p>
  <em> Well, thanks. I mean, mostly I’m just good at trying to be nice to people and trying to write my sappy Kylodemption fics. You up for Kylodemption? </em>
</p><p>Ben typed, <em> Obviously. </em> And from there, he knew there was no turning back.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Christmas Vacation</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The fun begins.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing. </p><p>Author’s Notes: Thank you to all the people who’ve supported this odd concept right now.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>If there was one benefit to Christmas break, it was the fact that Ben could head back to his childhood home and work on his new collaboration with DamnDameron. Phasma wasn’t spending Christmas with her family (they weren’t on good terms, to say the least), but Ben was happy to invite her to Christmas with his family. “The worst you have to put up with is my dad’s karaoke,” he joked. </p><p>Phasma laughed. “I’ll see if Armie’s available.” Her boyfriend, Armitage Hux, had had to have CPS called on his father, Brendol (and calling that bastard a father was being too generous, Ben thought), when he was a kid. Hux was currently living with Dopheld Mitaka, whose parents pretty much embraced the idea of taking Hux in. “Doph too.”</p><p>”We’ll have a big house,” Ben joked. “Just don’t let Dad sing Wham songs.”</p><p>Phasma laughed. </p><p>Hux and Mitaka were up for spending Christmas with Ben and Phasma. Mitaka, however, seemed alarmed at Ben. “Are you okay, Ben?” he said. “You seem too happy. Are you high or something? Was the movie actually good?”</p><p>In the background, Armitage snorted. “Ben doesn’t use weed, Doph.”</p><p>”Did the director of Duel of the Fates put him under the Imperius Curse?”</p><p>Armitage snorted again. “That’s <em>Harry Potter</em>, you prat.”</p><p>“Don’t fight with your brother, Armie,” Ben said, trying to suppress a laugh. “I’ll have to call your parents.” By that, he meant Mr. and Mrs. Mitaka. </p><p>”You leave Mrs. Mitaka out of this!” Armie said. </p><p>Ben actually did smirk. “But really, Doph, I’m working on a new WIP. You can thank DamnDameron’s sister for that.”</p><p>”I knew it!” Doph said. “I knew Ben was under the Imperius Curse!”</p><p>”Doph may have a point,” Armie said. “Did hell freeze over?”</p><p>”He’s a nice guy,” Ben said. “He’s charming. Witty. Insightful. Kind. Smart.” Even thinking back to his talk with DamnDameron, he thought about how the conversation had gone.   “He actually kind of relates to Kylo.”</p><p>”I hope he’s not talking about DOTF Kylo,” Armie said. </p><p>”Armie!” Ben said. “Of course not. He’s too nice for that. DamnDameron, I mean.”</p><p>”Oh. Good. I’d have to question if the director had incriminating photos of him or something...” Hux said. A beat. “Well, considering Imperial Productions takes criticism as well as your average badfic writer...”</p><p>Ben sighed. “You may be an asshole, but you have a point, Armie.”</p><p>”It’s my specialty,” Armie said. "But yeah, I suppose I can see his point, even if Kylo as a whole is a git...”</p><p>Ben rolled his eyes. “I suppose arguing with you about how he’s a deeper character than fandom gave him credit for because they wanted Vader 2.0 is pointless?”</p><p>”...yes.”</p><p>”But yeah, DamnDameron’s a good writer too.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p>The flight from Hosnia to Chandrila would take a while. For now, even as the intercom played “All I Want For Christmas Is You” by Mariah Carey, Ben sighed and got into his Twitter DMs.</p><p>
  <em>Hey...DamnDameron. (Should I call you that?)</em>
</p><p><em>You can call me “flyboy”</em>, DamnDameron typed. <em>My sister does</em>. </p><p><em>Right. So, flyboy...in an airport right now. We should think up some sort of outline</em>. </p><p><em>Oh, that</em>. Then, <em>And an idea. Putting the cart before the horse, Ren-bird</em>. 🙂</p><p>Ben sighed. <em>Point taken</em>, he typed. </p><p>
  <em>So, it’s Kiralo. Obviously. I was thinking of some sort of AU jumping-off point. I wrote down some ideas. <br/></em>
</p><p>He had. There was a time travel fic, there was a fic where General Karath kicked Kylo out of the First Order and Kylo had to find his own way back, there was something where the Force resurrected Kylo without his memory...</p><p>Ben frowned. Of all of them, the time travel one had the most promise. </p><p><em>I like the time travel one</em>, he typed. </p><p><em>So do I</em>, DamnDameron typed. <em>Question is how we redeem Kylo. And...everything else. Fuck, how do we explain his characterization besides “Sheev Palpatine can’t write subtlety”?</em></p><p><em>Good question, </em>Ben typed. <em>I mean...obviously, there’s some bad stuff that’s happened to him. Not like “his parents abused him”; it obviously wasn’t the case even if there’s a fringe who think so. But you know, what Kane nearly did to him, the comics where he failed to save the Academy from burning and got framed for the attack, the Supreme Leader’s “training“...he probably just cracked. More than he already did. I mean...<br/></em></p><p>He paused. He’d had issues with his family at seventeen (that were patched over), but they were resolved now, right? Everyone was fine. </p><p><em>Yeah</em>, DamnDameron typed. <em>Hell, people don’t realize parents don’t have to be abusive; sometimes they’re just...imperfect. I know they’re coping with bad home lives themselves, but...I dunno. Then again, I was kind of a shithead to my poor dad when I was sixteen...</em></p><p><em>You were a kid, </em>Ben typed. </p><p>
  <em>Yeah, but I said some stuff to him I’d take back in a heartbeat. He forgave me; I mean, most parents do that, but still...</em>
</p><p><em>That’s good. That he forgave you. </em>Ben typed. </p><p><em>Thanks</em>. <em>It’s not the whole story, but...there you go</em>. </p><p>Ben had to type a <em>Gotta go </em>to his new friend before boarding the plane with Phasma. The flight made him wish that airplanes weren’t a thing, especially since the teenage boys kicking the seat behind him made him wish he could parachute to Chandrila. (Unfortunately, it would leave Phasma behind, so...)</p><p>Phasma was tense, almost rigid. Ben had a feeling she was mentally plotting revenge on the boys kicking her seat and shrieking. Ben winked at her, and she smiled back. </p><p>Even as they got off the plane and greeted Ben’s parents, Ben sighed. “I wish there was a way to review airplanes,” he said. “That was <em>horrifying</em>.”</p><p>Han, Ben’s father, chuckled. “That website would be a hit, I tell you. Hey, Phas.”</p><p>Ben could remember, amusingly, his parents thinking Phasma was his girlfriend when he first brought her over. It had taken Phasma to clarify things; maybe his parents read fanfic too. (At least the fake-dating stuff)</p><p>”Hello,” Phasma said. “Armie and Doph are probably on their way.”</p><p>”Ah, good.”</p><p>Ben could only hope against hope that his father wouldn’t decide to show off his embarrassing dance moves. </p><p>***</p><p>It was on the drive to Ben’s house that Ben typed to DamnDameron, <em>Got off the plane. I swear I’ll need a Tylenol. <br/></em></p><p><em>You’re going home for the holidays? </em>DamnDameron said. </p><p>Ben typed, <em>Yes</em>. Around him, Phasma, Han and Leia were talking animatedly about DOTF. Han was apparently angry that no one had tried to help Kylo (“If these jerkwads truly loved him, they would have done something!”) while Leia was talking with Phasma about the sexism in the movie and going against <em>Space Battles</em>’ themes (not that they were wrong, Ben thought). <em>My family’s pretty big</em>. </p><p><em>Huh</em>, DamnDameron typed. <em>You’re lucky</em>. <em>Though I have people like my grandpa and uncle and dad... </em>A beat. <em>My uncle was my mom’s childhood friend. They were inseparable. Then my mom got sick...</em></p><p><em>I’m sorry.</em> Ben typed. He couldn’t imagine a loss that painful. </p><p><em>Not your fault</em>. </p><p>“Bit quiet, Ben?” Han said. </p><p>”Just jetlagged,” Ben said. “Idiot kids were bothering me and Phas.”</p><p>”You poor man,” Han said. </p><p>”At least I’m off that plane,” Ben said. “And I made a new friend.”</p><p>”Did you?”</p><p>”DamnDameron.”</p><p>”Wasn’t he the guy who was kind of your rival?”</p><p>”Friendly rival,” Ben said, smiling. Then, “He’s actually a nice guy.” <em>And strong. Kind. Creative. Smart...</em></p><p>He paused. Was he starting to get infatuated? You couldn’t just get infatuated with a stranger on the Internet...</p><p>”Ah. Good,” Han said. Even as they drove to the house, Ben wondered how much his father really knew about him. </p><p>***</p><p>Ben had to go upstairs to rest. Upstairs, in the bedroom of his childhood home with his stuffed dog, he bounced ideas back and forth with DamnDameron while <em>National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation</em> played in the background, already unable to wait for what happened next. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Author’s Notes: Yes, I know the irony of writing about Christmas in June. Don’t @ me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Coping Mechanisms</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ben’s uncle comes back into the picture.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Waking up in his old childhood home was kind of disconcerting, of course — the same feeling you’d get when you returned to a place that you’d been away from for quite some time. Ben stretched, still a bit disconcerted from his nightmare — he didn’t really remember it very well, but he knew that it was unsettling. He logged onto his Twitter DMs, already reluctant to go back to sleep. </p><p><em>Hey, </em>DamnDameron had typed, <em>Morning, Ren-bird. </em></p><p><em>Thank God you’re here, </em>Ben typed. <em>I had a nightmare. <br/></em></p><p>
  <em>😦 You often have nightmares?</em>
</p><p><em>Yeah. Sometimes I wish it was like in that Elm Street movie where you could pull people into your dreams, </em>Ben typed. </p><p>
  <em>I was almost thinking of those Kiralo Force Bond fics, but that’ll work too. 🙂</em>
</p><p>Ben laughed faintly. It just felt natural, chatting with DamnDameron over Twitter. That whole thing — did collaborators often tell each other about their nightmares? That was the question. </p><p><em>But sorry you had a nightmare</em>. <em>Nightmares can fuck themselves. </em></p><p>Ben laughed again. Then, <em>Big mood</em>. <em>How are you?</em></p><p>A pause. Then, <em>If it wasn’t for the fact I love Kiralo, I would have gotten out of here a long time ago</em>. <em>Some moof-milker decided to get angry because I blocked him on Discord. <br/></em></p><p><em>Oof, </em>Ben typed<em>. <br/></em></p><p>
  <em>Yeah. Luckily, some other Kiralos weren’t cool with this, but still others...</em>
</p><p>Ben winced. <em>Oh, really? Who do I have to challenge to a lightsaber duel</em>? </p><p><em>It’s okay</em>, DamnDameron typed. <em>It was just a bit scary</em>. <em>The guy...I feel bad for him because he had a tough life, but I wish he wouldn’t lash out at people in terrible ways. <br/></em></p><p><em>Yeah. Oof. </em>A beat<em>. Who’d be enough of a dick to be mean to you, of all people?</em></p><p>
  <em>Well, you’re sweet, but...some have. Sometimes they’ve been antis assuming we’ll bring the progress of social justice to ruin automatically, occasionally they’ve been some...bad apples. <br/></em>
</p><p><em>Well, antis don’t know anything, </em>Ben typed<em>. <br/></em></p><p>
  <em>I can feel compassion for them, at least, and hope they get therapy instead of taking it out on other people. <br/></em>
</p><p>Ben smiled<em>. You’re such a Kane. OT Kane, that is. <br/></em></p><p>
  <em>Guilty. 😉 I think we need to be kinder — it separates the good parts of fandom from the parts that ruin everything. <br/></em>
</p><p>Ben nodded. He admired DamnDameron, how kind he was, how...steely he was even when he’d been harassed. It was admittedly weird; he was used to the idea of other antis going after Kiralos. Of course a bird was capable of flight, of course antis could mistake shipping and not shipping for activism. (And it didn’t help that they seemed to think of the idea of a woman in combat meant the woman was being abused, at least from what Ben could gather) Other Kiralos harassing someone who was so kind? </p><p>That was something else. </p><p>***</p><p>Ben doubted he was really ready to watch <em>The Force Awakens; </em>knowing that that was how the trilogy ended really was painful. But he could work on the outline in Google Docs with DamnDameron. Poe, apparently his name was. Interesting name. </p><p>He’d have to ask Poe about it. In the meantime, it was a relief; saying DamnDameron, even in his head, over and over, would get exhausting for Ben. </p><p>
  <b>So your name’s Poe?</b>
</p><p>
  <em>Yeah, I know. Kind of a letdown, isn’t it? :)</em>
</p><p>
  <b>Not really. Poe Dameron — it really does sound like a Space Battles hero, doesn’t it?</b>
</p><p><em>Would say the same for you, Ben Solo</em>. </p><p>Ben chuckled softly. He wouldn’t deny that he was flattered by what Poe was saying. </p><p>
  <em>My mom was actually a bit of a horror nerd and the name “Poe”...well, she read Edgar Allen Poe in college and really liked him (stuff like “The Raven”) so...here I am.</em>
</p><p>
  <b>She sounds awesome</b>
  <em>. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>She was. So...back on topic. Hope I’m not being a killjoy. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <b>Not really. :)</b>
</p><p>They went back and forth, brainstorming ideas, thinking up interactions and lines of dialogue and things of that nature. Occasionally, Ben laughed. It felt good to laugh with someone. </p><p>***</p><p>It was later at lunch that Mom dropped the bombshell. “Ben...I thought I’d mention your uncle’s coming.”</p><p>”What?” Ben would have been less surprised if Mom had said Mothman was coming over for Christmas. ”Uncle Luke?”</p><p>Mom sighed. “I know you’re still angry at him for walking out on the family...”</p><p><em>No shit</em>, Ben thought. </p><p>“...but he really does want to be better. He’s bringing his wife, Mara, over...”</p><p>”He got <em>married</em>?” Ben swore Phasma was staring at him, but he was too shocked to say anything. </p><p>Another sigh from Mom. “He misses you, you know. He wants to make amends. Ben...you had fun times with him as a child. Give him a chance.”</p><p>
  <em>As if. </em>
</p><p>“I...need time to think, Mom." That was the most diplomatic thing Ben could think of; he didn’t want to make a scene in front of everyone at lunch, even though Mom had (why couldn’t she have brought it up in private?).</p><p>At least talking with Poe helped. Ben, truthfully, was angry at Uncle Luke for disappearing for fuck-knows-what-reason. Mom said he was having a tough time, but Mom had her share of tough times thanks to her asshole of a biological dad and she didn’t just run away. Dad had a bad time in foster care, and he didn’t just run away. </p><p>What had made Uncle Luke such a coward?</p><p><em>You know what?</em> Poe said. <em>We need a distraction, both of us. I think that Google Doc is the perfect way to do it</em>.</p><p>At least Ben’s current mental state was pretty good at fueling his writing for Kylo in that moment. Just all that anger, and grief...he obviously wasn’t Kylo, but he supposed in that moment, being that entity was better than snapping. </p><p>It was when he was done with one portion of exploring Kylo’s grief over wasting his life that Poe took over. He was good, Ben thought, especially with dialogue — Kylo’s uncle making another appearance to admit that he failed him while also wondering why his nephew wasted his life. Ben took over when he could. They went back and forth, back and forth, and Ben supposed it was better than nothing. </p><p>It was better than exploding, at least. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. And Post!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The fic begins proper.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p></p><div class="fic">
  <p><span class="redlinks"><br/>This Time With Purpose</span> by <span class="redlinks">AKnightofRen</span>, <span class="redlinks"> DamnDameron</span></p>
  <p class="fichead">
    <span class="tags">Space Battles Sequel Trilogy</span>
  </p>
  <p class="date">December 20, 2020</p>
  <p><b><span class="tags">Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</span></b>, <span class="rtag">Kylo Ren/Kira</span>, <span class="tags">Star Wars: Duel of The Fates Spoilers</span>, <span class="tags">Time Travel Fix-It</span>, <span class="tags">Kylo Ren Redemption</span>, <span class="tags">That’s Not How The Force Works</span>, <span class="tags">Jacen Starkiller Deserved Better</span></p>
  <p>(SPOILERS FOR SPACE BATTLES, EPISODE IX: DUEL OF THE FATES!)</p>
  <p>After his death on the planet of Mortis at the hands of Kira, Kylo Ren is given a second chance at redemption. Transported into the body of his twenty-three year old self, the former Supreme Leader of the First Order is sent back to the day that Kane Starkiller tried to kill him. Meanwhile, Supreme Leader Aldric, his predecessor, is far from pleased with the Force meddling in his plans, and hunts for young Jacen Starkiller, and Jacen has to fight him — while making his way back to Kira.</p>
  <p class="stats">Language: English Words: 1033  Chapters: 1/? Comments: <span class="graylinks">10</span> Kudos: <span class="graylinks">20</span> Hits: 30</p>
</div><p>***</p><p>They’d gotten twenty kudos so far. </p><p>Twenty. It wasn’t much so far, but people were interested in their collaboration. Tweeting about it. Posting about it on Tumblr. People were excited for them. Maybe they were just eager for some comfort food for the soul after Kylo’s fate, but still. </p><p>He logged onto the Google Doc where they were planning everything, outlining everything, and typed:</p><p>
  <b>Did you see that?!</b>
</p><p>Poe typed back, <em>I know. :) It’s pretty amazing, that we can at least help people who’ve been hurting. That’s the great thing about fanfic, wouldn’t you say?</em></p><p>
  <b>Yeah. Sometimes I wish fanfic was canon. Not the badly written stuff, but the good stuff. Like your memory loss fic...</b>
</p><p>Silence. Then Poe typed, <em>Well, shit, I’m flattered. Especially coming from a writer I admire</em>. </p><p><b>Thanks. :)</b> </p><p>If Ben’s heart could make Squeeing noises, he had a feeling it would. </p><p>***</p><p>”They’re interested!” Ben announced to Mitaka, Phasma and Hux. “They’re interested in our collaboration!”</p><p>”That’s nice, Ben,” Leia said, sounding less than enthused. Ben’s heart sank. Then again, he supposed he shouldn’t have been surprised. After all, she didn’t really “get” fanfic. She mostly saw it as a toxic environment, even though she’d written her share of Kirk/Spock back in the day. Maybe things were different when they had fanzines, Ben thought. </p><p>Han, however, grinned. “My little bandit’s going places and fixing bad canon,” he said. </p><p>”True,” Leia said. “So I assume you’re not fighting with your archnemesis anymore?”</p><p>Ben scoffed. “We’re not archnemeses. This isn’t <em>Batman</em>.”</p><p>“Good,” Hux said, “Because you’re too young to be Batman.”</p><p>Another scoff from Ben. “You realize I’m twenty, right?”</p><p>”Exactly.”</p><p>Ben sighed. He sat down. “How’s Twitter?” he said. </p><p>”It’s Twitter,” Hux said. “Some fringe decided to harass the social media manager.”</p><p><em>And I was so happy earlier</em>... “Antis?” Ben said. </p><p>”No. Apparently some Kiralo shippers got upset because they thought that the social media manager was pandering to the wankers who didn’t like <em>The Last Jedi</em>.” A sigh. “And Sam’s actor got torn a new one because he made a Sam/Kira joke.”</p><p>”That’s ridiculous,” Ben said. “I mean...what did he say?”</p><p>”Something about ‘laying pipe’. Some thought it was a sex thing, some thought it wasn’t and accused Kiralo shippers of being racist..." Hux sighed. “One day, this bloody fandom’s going to give me an aneurysm, I swear to God."</p><p>”Well, don’t,” Phasma said, kissing his cheek. “We’d miss you.”</p><p>”Touching,” Hux said. “But here’s to 2021 being relatively peaceful...and the rest of this Christmas being happy.”</p><p>Leia sighed. “It’s the Internet,” she said. “I never had this nonsense when I was writing for fanzines...”</p><p>”Of course not,” Han said wryly. “We had it over snail mail.” A beat. “Wow, you and I really are old, Leia.”</p><p>Ben chuckled a little. Then, “Hux, you really should stay off Twitter."</p><p>”I should. To be fair, some Kiralos have stood up for that social media manager. And Sam’s actor. I suppose it’s the moments of clarity that I live for...”</p><p>Ben supposed. </p><p>***</p><p>They were watching <em>National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation</em> in the basement while Ben chatted with Poe. </p><p><b>Dragged into watching the Griswolds with my friends. How are you?</b> </p><p>
  <em>Doing some planning. Wondering if Jacen would assume he ate bad bantha steak and the events of the Sequel Trilogy were a nightmare. (Semi-kidding!)</em>
</p><p>“Texting your boyfriend?” Phasma teased. </p><p>Ben sighed. “The people are hungry for more, Phas. I might as well give it to them. Well, me and P — DamnDameron.”</p><p>Phasma raised an eyebrow before turning back to the TV. Even as Chevy Chase struggled with finding a Christmas tree (to say the least), Ben supposed he’d get to the next chapter (and in real life news, the inevitable, unavoidably awkward Christmas dinner with his asshole Uncle Luke) when he got there. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Kaydel</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ben gets an unpleasant surprise when his extended family comes to visit.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p><p>Author’s Notes: Yes, Kaydel Ko Connix is Luke’s daughter here.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Working on the next chapter, when Ben got time away from watching Christmas movies with his friends and family, was a relief. There was something about just planning in the Google doc with Poe that was enough to make him feel...well, for a lack of a better word, better. Happier. It was like in the doc, they could just plan things out. Make things better. </p><p><strong>It’s just a relief not worrying about my uncle at the moment, </strong>Ben typed. </p><p><em>Don’t worry too much. If he causes trouble...well, your mom can kick him out of the house. </em>A beat. <em>I guess that’s harsh on Christmas, but still...</em></p><p>
  <strong>I just can’t believe he’s coming back after all the misery he caused my mom. </strong>
</p><p>
  <em>He could have had his reasons. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <strong>Maybe. When I was a kid, I pretended that he was a Jedi who had to go into hiding on an island because he was being hunted by a monster. Kind of weird that TFA used the same plot point for Kane. <br/></strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Well, strange minds. :) I have mixed feelings about Kane’s arc — I think it was interesting that Thrawn Zahn played with the whole “wise mentor” trope to make him more flawed and fleshed out...but I don’t think he would have tried to hurt Jacen. Maybe we could try and fix that in our WIP, make it so...the Supreme Leader was mind-controlling him? I’m just throwing out bullshit suggestions. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <strong>I like your bullshit suggestions. :)</strong>
</p><p>Truthfully, Kane had touched a nerve with Ben if only because he reminded Ben too much of Uncle Luke. Not so much in the trying-to-kill-your-nephew thing, but in the sense that Kane’s mood swings reminded Ben of Luke. He’d run out into the parking lot then and there, and Dad had had to come and get him. (And that had been 2016, he’d been eighteen then)</p><p>He wondered if he should tell Poe that. The fact that seeing how Kane treated Kira had given him a panic attack. It wasn’t like he was trying to excuse Kylo’s actions, but even though Ben knew he never would have done what Kylo did, there were some elements of Kylo’s backstory that hit too close to home. </p><p><em>Well, thank you. :) </em>At least Poe typing back felt almost stabilizing. </p><p>
  <strong>No problem. I mean, I admit I don’t like Kane (let’s say he reminds me of my uncle) but it’ll be interesting, seeing if we can salvage anything. <br/></strong>
</p><p>He paused. He wondered if he should really be telling Poe all this. If he should be saying these things. What if Poe basically rejected what he said?</p><p><em>He reminds you of your uncle, huh? That really sucks. </em>Poe typed. </p><p>
  <b>S’okay. It’s just one of those reasons that I don’t really want to meet with him again. And one of those reasons I think antis...just don’t get it. I know some of them had rough homelives, but they don’t get that...I’m not suggesting what I am just to get Kylo off the hook; it’s more that I can relate to him. In some areas, not the killing thing. Like this-could-have-been-me. <br/></b>
</p><p>
  <em>Makes sense. I’m sorry your uncle had such a mean streak. Me, I think that most of the blame lies with Aldric; I mean, he was the one who just made a shaky situation worse. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <b>Yeah</b>
  <em>. <br/></em>
</p><p>At least Ben could find a basis for how to portray Kane. In the end, he couldn’t blame Nellith or Matt, Kylo’s parents. Nellith had tried to save her son, and so had Matt. It really was Kane that was responsible, seeing the good in his father but not in his nephew. </p><p>He could remember, also, Luke speaking fondly of Anakin Skywalker. Probably the only person who brought out the best in Uncle Luke, Ben thought. Now that he thought about it. He typed up his share of the inner monologue on Jacen’s part — the mixture of remorse and desire for revenge for what had happened. His desire to hurt, his desire to atone. Even alternating between the inner monologue and Poe’s dialogue (Poe was really good at dialogue, Ben thought), Ben supposed it was the closest thing to a practice reconciliation with his uncle that he could really get. </p><p>***</p><p>The doorbell rang later, and hearing the family dog, Chewie, barking and the muffled sounds of Luke’s voice and the voices of Ben’s parents...Ben supposed that if there was ever a good time to play the Imperial March, it was now. </p><p>He sighed, before walking upstairs from the basement to where Uncle Luke was, with a red-headed woman who looked to be in her middle age — and a young woman with her blond hair in buns on the side of her head. Kaydel, apparently her name was. Kaydel Jade-Skywalker. Ben could have sworn his brain skidded to a screeching halt. So not only did his uncle just <em>leave</em> the family behind, but he also got married and had a teenage daughter?</p><p>At least his parents looked just as uncomfortable with Kaydel and Mara’s presence. Even shaking hands with Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara and Kaydel, Ben doubted he could feel any more like his life had turned into a soap opera. </p><p>”You’re Ben Solo, aren’t you?” Kaydel chattered. "It’s really nice to meet you!”</p><p>”I’m charmed. Really.” It wasn’t her fault that Uncle Luke was irresponsible, it really wasn’t. Still, trying to act civil...Ben couldn’t help but think of Sheldon Cooper on <em>The Big Bang Theory</em> trying to tell a lie. </p><p>Still, he tried to keep up the façade. Tried not to lash out at Kaydel, or Mara — at least they seemed like nice people. Kept up as much of a façade as he could, at least before he could make a flimsy excuse and duck up to his room...there, he could have a near-panic attack. </p><p>Contacting Poe on the Google document, he recapped (leaving out names, of course) the visit. </p><p><em>Well, shit,</em> Poe typed back. <em>Sounds like a mess. I’m sorry. Need a distraction</em>?</p><p><b>Please</b>. </p><p>It probably sounded pathetic. Ben didn’t care. He just needed to get out of there, away from all this soap opera idiocy. Everything. </p><p>At least as they went back and forth on the most recent chapter, the evacuation of the Jedi Enclave and Aldric learning about the disturbance in the Force, Ben could be reassured that the drama they were typing up actually meant something. Making things right.</p><p>There was that. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Han To The Rescue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The first meal with Luke, Mara and Kaydel goes awkwardly before Han intervenes.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Posting the next chapter seemed to get good results too. It was still overwhelming, Ben thought, the idea that people were invested in this project. That they wanted Kira and Kylo to get together eventually, even though Kiralo technically wasn’t “canon”. (Thrawn Zahn had wanted to have a Kiralo romance. “It has certain potential to be artistically done,” he’d said in an interview) People were still invested, which was good because God willing, Ben was. <br/><br/>More than invested. It hadn’t been the torture scene that had gotten him invested in Kiralo. It had been <em>The Last Jedi, </em>when the actress who played Kira and the actor who played Kylo had formed a bizarre kinship against all odds. They were both alone, cold, shivering in the dark. They both had masters they were trying to please even though said masters treated them poorly. They both were sent away from their families. That was where Ben started to identify with Kylo. The seeds had been planted when Kylo had broken down to his father on the bridge — no one who was that vulnerable could be completely evil. Thrawn Zahn had just carefully tended those seeds, like a garden. </p><p>And then Sheev Palpatine had fucked it up. </p><p>Still, that was where fanfic writers came in, right? Setting right what once went wrong.</p><p>***</p><p>”I hope I’m not being creepy, but I really like your shirt.”</p><p>Kaydel said that at breakfast. Ben was confused for a moment, all while Mitaka and Hux were debating the climax of the Deathly Hallows part two movie, and Phasma was watching Luke and Mara like she expected them to betray everyone and would maul them if they even tried. </p><p>”Oh, that,” Ben said, pointing to his Space Battles shirt. “Yeah. Thanks. You could say that I’m a fan.”</p><p>”Indeed,” Luke cut in. “Though I don’t know why you would be involved in fanfiction. Especially <em>Space Battles. </em>It’s quite infantile.”</p><p>Ben could all but feel the humiliation swell up in him. Apparently, his uncle hadn’t really changed. Much. </p><p>Mara spoke up. “Harsh. I mean, everyone has their guilty pleasures.”</p><p>Phasma spoke up too. “I happen to like it. Well, except <em>Duel of the Fates</em>, but...”</p><p>“My point exactly,” Luke said. “The Sequel Trilogy was a mistake. Cardboard characters, monotone acting, attempts to force social commentary that didn’t belong in <em>Space Battles</em>...”</p><p>“If you’re talking about Kira — ” Phasma cut in. </p><p>Han cut in, clearly a bit uneasy. “Y’know, every time they say that girl’s name, I think of Ben’s Aunt Qi’ra...”</p><p>Mara raised an eyebrow. “Really?”</p><p><em>Dad to the rescue</em>, Ben thought. He sent his dad a grin. </p><p>Han continued. “Yeah. She says that watching the Sequel Trilogy’s a bit weird for her. Doesn’t help that the heroine’s kind of got that coloring...”</p><p>“Really?” Mara said. “Quite a coincidence.”</p><p>Crisis seemed to be averted, at least. Ben smiled at his father again, and Han made the “Okay” sign with his hand. </p><p>***</p><p>It was when Ben was mercifully away from the others that he logged into the Google doc. </p><p>
  <strong>My dad is a fucking superhero, I swear to God. <br/></strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Really?</em>
</p><p>Even recapping everything that happened, Ben couldn’t help but think about how close it had come to being a disaster. Apparently, his uncle hadn’t really learned anything. He was still an ass, and Ben would have to deal with him until Christmas was over. </p><p>He couldn’t just let his uncle ruin everything. He really couldn’t. Even the Griswolds came out victorious in the end. They had to. So did Ben. </p><p>Poe typed back, <em>You know, if I had a freighter, I’d whisk you out of there. Just saying. 😉</em></p><p>Ben couldn’t say that he was really complaining about the idea of being rescued. </p><p>
  <b>The dashing pilot rescuing the dude in distress? I can get onboard with that. :D</b>
</p><p>Ben talked with Poe, planning out the next chapter. There was something, he thought, about planning out the next chapter that was therapeutic. At least the drama that they were planning was going to turn out all right in the end. It was within their control. </p><p>That was something, wasn’t it?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Exchange</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ben and Poe take some time out of their WIP in order to give each other Christmas gifts.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>December 23. A day before Christmas Eve. Even as Ben worked on the next chapter with Poe, Poe typed in the Google doc, <em>You know...Christmas Eve is coming up and I feel terrible. <br/></em></p><p>
  <strong>How come?</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>I don’t have a present for you. I mean, I’ve got presents for my family and RL friends and online friends, but not you. I feel like an ass.</em>
</p><p>Ben smiled faintly. The very idea of Poe fretting about not getting him a present was actually kind of sweet, in a way. <strong>You know we’re working on a collaboration, right? I mean, you don’t have to...</strong></p><p>
  <em>You’re my friend. My new friend. :)</em>
</p><p>Ben’s heart skipped a beat, he swore it did. Then again, Poe thought just about everyone was his friend. He couldn’t think of many people Poe actually seemed to dislike. </p><p>It was just something Poe said. Right? </p><p>
  <strong>Well, thanks. :)</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>No problem. So...what are you thinking? Fic? Art? What-have-you?</em>
</p><p>Ben smiled. <b>You could write me a fic</b>. <b>I’m thinking some sort of Christmas-y AU. <br/></b></p><p><em>I support this.</em> <b> <br/></b></p><p>
  <b>Great! Maybe an AU where Kira’s invited to Jacen’s for Christmas dinner?</b>
</p><p>
  <em>A bit of write-what-you-know? ;-)</em>
</p><p>
  <b>Maybe a little. But seriously, can you picture Kira having to put up with the Starkiller family’s dysfunctional bullshit?</b>
</p><p>
  <em>I love this.</em>
</p><p>Ben beamed. <b>Maybe I could write something for you too?</b></p><p><em>I’d love it. Maybe Christmas party shenanigans? Like, Jacen spills his guts under the influence of alcohol and Kira has to take him home?</em> <b><br/></b></p><p>
  <strong>This is perfect. <br/></strong>
</p><p>It was a relief focusing on the modern AU fic for Poe. It was simpler, he thought. There, there wasn’t any baggage about Kylo torturing Kira, or opposite sides, or Kylo’s family dragging the whole galaxy into their drama when they all could have benefited from a therapist. </p><p>It was just simpler that way. Funnier. </p><p>(Some people called modern AUs the path of least resistance — a bit of a pun, all things considered. Ben’s take was that bleakness and misery could be overrated at times)</p><p>***</p><p>”What are you working on?”</p><p>Kaydel. Ben could only assume she was trying again after they’d very narrowly dodged Uncle Luke stirring up trouble. </p><p>“Just...stuff.”</p><p>Kaydel shrugged. “I don’t want to disturb you.”</p><p>”It’s fine.” Damn him and his guilt. “I’m writing a gift fic.”</p><p>”So you write fic?” Kaydel said. </p><p>Ben shrugged. “Doesn’t have to be a girl’s thing...”</p><p>”Oh yeah, that bit in Fanlore was bullshit. Guys can damn well write fanfic if they want to. Toxic masculinity’s overrated.”</p><p>Ben decided he liked her. “Do you write fic?”</p><p>”Yeah,” Kaydel said. “Dad doesn’t approve. I love him, but he doesn’t get how wonderful it can be.” A beat. “According to Aunt Leia, he apparently used to write fanfic for classic <em>Doctor Who, </em>so I’m really confused...”</p><p>”Who knows?” Ben said. “Did he ever...y’know, you’d be explaining how this little detail tied into Kira and Kylo’s relationship, and he’d just stare at you like you grew another head?” A beat. “I mean, Mom did that to me once. I was talking about the hand-touching scene — ”</p><p>”Oh, I remember that!” Kaydel exclaimed. “I remember my friend Rose was like, ‘think they should get a room?’”</p><p>Ben snorted. “I think Thrawn even said it was meant to be...symbolic.”</p><p>Kaydel snorted. “Think I owe Rose twenty bucks.” Then, “I was actually rooting for John/Kira, but <em>Duel of the Fates</em> made it a little creepy. Then again, I don’t think Sheev would know romance if it danced in front of him wearing Nellith’s gold bikini.”</p><p>Ben sighed. “And that’s the part where if I was a droid, I’d be begging for a memory wipe...”</p><p>”Sorry.”</p><p>”Well, you’re not wrong.” </p><p>Kaydel smirked a bit. Ben found that it was bizarrely endearing. </p><p>Then she said, more seriously, “It’s just messy, y’know? I’ve been mostly writing fix fics pretending <em>Duel of the Fates</em> never happened. Like, Kira’s not a creep to John and everything’s fine. And Kylo doesn’t suddenly go Doctor Evil on us...”</p><p>Ben snorted. “Someone wrote that AU, I guarantee it.”</p><p>”I’ve been thinking of toying with Kiralo,” Kaydel said. “It’s just...they don’t seem to like John/Kira shippers very much.”</p><p>”Some do,” Ben said. </p><p>”Yeah, well, the more militant ones don’t. They mostly see John as like...the Gaston to Kylo’s Beast. Which isn’t really fair.”</p><p>”It isn’t,” Ben agreed. “If it’s any comfort...I don’t think that way.”</p><p>”I figured you wouldn’t,” Kaydel said. Then, “So that gift fic...”</p><p>”I have a co-writer,” Ben said. “On this time travel fic. You can thank his sister for that...” And even explaining to Kaydel, he was aware that the premise was probably a little silly. </p><p>Kaydel grinned. “I love it. So...what’s he like?”</p><p>Ben faltered. “Well,” he said, “He’s talented. Really good with dialogue. Funny. A good friend. Kind. Has a lot of empathy and affection for people; it’s like he loves them, not in that flirty Jack Harkness way but like he wants to be everyone’s friend...”</p><p>Kaydel looked knowing. “You sound like Rose when she’s talking about her boyfriend.”</p><p>”Oh, we’re not...together.” So why did his heart race at the thought? </p><p>”Her boyfriend’s Finn. Finn Windu. They’re pretty crazy about each other.” Kaydel smiled faintly. “Either way, you seem to get on pretty well with him. I’m glad.”</p><p>”I do.”</p><p>It was too soon to fall in love. And Ben didn’t know everything about Poe — including what he looked like. For all intents and purposes, he could be in for one of those catfishing horror stories...he hoped it wasn’t. Granted, good things didn’t just happen to Ben Solo, but he wished that just this once he could have something good happen to him.</p><p>(Then again, did he have any right to call his life difficult?)</p><p>***</p><p>Even recapping parts of the conversation with Kaydel (Ben left out the “in love” part; he didn’t know how he felt and he didn’t want to force it on Poe), Ben found that it was amusing that the Google doc, in a way, had become their personal chatroom.</p><p><em>She seems nice</em>, Poe typed. <em>That’s good</em>. </p><p><b>Yeah</b>. Ben didn’t feel good about hiding parts of the truth from Poe, but it was the right thing to do. He still had time to figure things out, after all — it wasn’t like he knew for certain he was in love with Poe Dameron. </p><p>They talked. Ben talked about the process of his gift fic without giving away spoilers, and Poe did the same. And they discussed some stuff for their WIP as well. Stuff like Jacen reuniting with his mother. </p><p><b>I don’t think he’d just have a nothing response</b>, Ben typed. <b>I mean, he hesitated to fire on her. It’s obvious he loved his parents and was conflicted about hurting/killing them. <br/></b></p><p><em>You really do think like your fics. :) </em>Poe typed, and there was that fluttery feeling again, there was that feeling like his heart had skipped a beat. </p><p>
  <b>I’m glad. But yeah, he’d be conflicted, wouldn’t he? I mean, “conflicted” is his middle name, but still.</b>
</p><p>
  <em>True. :) But yeah, he’d also be looking for Kira.</em>
</p><p>It wasn’t that creepy. Not really. After all, Kira had been twenty-one in TFA (thirty-one in DOTF), and Kylo had been twenty-five. So Kira would be nineteen in this story to Kylo’s twenty-three. It would at least be a good thing, rescuing her from Jakku. </p><p>Although there was another thing...</p><p><b>We’ll have to deal with the Johnira when we get to it, right?</b> </p><p>Johnira, of course, was the portmanteau of John/Kira.</p><p>
  <em>Oh yeah, that. We could always just pair him with Sam. I honestly thought they were going that direction. You could say Stormhunter’s a side OTP of mine. :)</em>
</p><p>Ben chuckled. It didn’t really need saying; after all, Poe usually found ways to cram Stormhunter (John/Sam) into his Kiralo stories, as cameos or subplots. (Along with Lily/Karath, among other things) Ben couldn’t say why Stormhunter occasionally caught flak in fandom, especially since it was such a harmless ship. (In a way, Poe kind of reminded Ben of John the bounty hunter. Ben identified with Kira and Kylo, but John? John he definitely had a crush on)</p><p>
  <b>That’s a great idea! You’re a genius, Poe!</b>
</p><p>
  <em>I try. ;-)</em>
</p><p>It said something when that winking emoticon was enough to make Ben’s heart skip a beat. </p><p>***</p><p>Planning was one thing. Having to switch gears to work more on Poe’s gift fic was something else. It was still a bit surreal, working on that sort of stuff when technically, the Saga was over (well, okay, there was still some stuff coming out. Apparently. Still), but he was pretty determined to give Poe a good Christmas. </p><p>After all, Poe was willing to do the same for him, a man he was just getting to know. </p><p>Eventually, he finished. He’d have to do some editing, of course (assuming Phas wanted to beta for him), make sure it was perfect. Poe deserved a good fic. After all, Poe was his friend, and he meant something to him —</p><p>“Merry Christmas,” he murmured to the emptiness of his room. There were no doubt oceans between them, but was that very far? </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. A Very Kiralo Christmas</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Christmas arrives.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Christmas Eve. Ben wouldn’t deny, even as the day rolled around, that he was excited — and maybe nervous about Christmas ending. </p><p>Kaydel at least seemed to be bonding with Ben. She was a nice girl, Ben thought — it wasn’t her fault that her dad was an asshat. “I was actually thinking of writing some Kiralo myself,” she said to Ben, when they could get some time with Phasma, Armie and Mitaka. “I guess it’s just made me nervous because...some of the good stuff is really, really good and I don’t think I could ever be that good.”</p><p>Armie snorted. “In the beginning, yes. I’d say it’s become more overrun with A/B/O and all that nonsense as of late.”</p><p>”Armitage!” Phasma scolded. </p><p>Kaydel sighed. “I actually find it a bit reassuring,” she said. “I mean...I don’t think I’d be very good at handling Kira’s character. I mean, DamnDameron’s memory loss fic was so good. It was like he actually made Kylo work for his redemption and explained what redemption means and all. And he made his growing relationship with Kira believable. It felt like it really could have been something that Firmus Piett or Thrawn Zahn would have written.” Firmus Piett had been the director of the first movie of the new trilogy. He had been pushing more for Sam/Kira (which was all right, Ben thought; he just saw the two more like bickering siblings. He hadn’t thought of pairing Kira with anyone until <em>The Last Jedi</em>, really), but had been gracious about Thrawn’s take on things. (And he hadn’t commented yet on Palpatine’s take on things)</p><p>”I know!” Ben said. “He’s really good. Even working with him...he’s really talented and nice.”</p><p>Kaydel smiled. “You’re probably the luckiest man on Earth, working with DamnDameron.”</p><p>”I am,” Ben said. “Speaking of which, Phas...I wrote a giftfic for him.”</p><p>”Really?” Phasma said, sounding amused. </p><p>Ben sighed. “What I’m saying is that can you look over my draft and make sure AutoCorrect didn’t try and fuck with my spelling?”</p><p>Phasma smiled. “No problem.”</p><p>***</p><p>Phasma was good. Really good. By the time that she was done, the draft really did look presentable. Ben could believe that Poe would like it. He hoped. After all, it was just normal jitters, trying to make a good gift for his new friend. It had nothing to do with how Poe could make him feel. Right?</p><p>It was after being dragged into a game of Jackbox Party Pack (which, admittedly, was fun. Ben enjoyed sneaking some fandom references into some of the word-based games) and opening holiday crackers that Ben retired to his room. He was tired, very tired. Pleasantly tired, though. Even Uncle Luke hadn’t been an asshole, and even Dad hadn’t decided to do something embarrassing. It was a relief, really. Even in his room, his childhood room, Ben typed to Poe, <b>I take it your family wore you out too?</b></p><p>
  <em>A bit. :) You know, it’s Christmas — we should take a break from updating our collab, don’t you think?</em>
</p><p>Ben smiled. <b>Yeah</b>. <b>I finished your fic, by the way. <br/></b></p><p>
  <em>Excellent! I did the same. It was fun, your prompt, it really was. I’m glad. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <b>Thanks! I can’t wait to see it. <br/></b>
</p><p>
  <em>Same with mine. :) <br/></em>
</p><p>There was silence for a while. Silence, and then Ben typed, <em>Merry Christmas, Poe. You know, I’m glad I met you</em>. <em>I’m glad your sister’s a meddler. ;-)</em></p><p><b>So am I. :) </b> <b></b></p><p>There it was again, that fluttery feeling. It shouldn’t make him feel that wonderful. But here he was. He needed to think of something to say. </p><p>
  <strong>My cousin wants to write Kiralo. </strong>
</p><p>
  <em>Is that so? Well, tell her to be careful — the antis can definitely have a mean streak. <br/></em>
</p><p><b>I know.</b> <em> <br/></em></p><p>
  <em>But I say as long as she finds her people, that’s really what matters. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <strong>Exactly. <br/></strong>
</p><p>They talked, talked until it was time for Ben to go to sleep. He supposed the best thing he could hope for, in the end, was for Santa to bring them a 2021 that made up for 2020.</p><p>***</p><p>Christmas Day. Ben had definitely had his share of good Christmas Days, and there was something about seeing the presents under the tree, the gatherings of presents, that was enough to make his heart race in excitement. </p><p>”You know,” Leia joked, “There was a time when I could at least persuade you to get dressed properly.”</p><p>Ben shrugged. “The world’s not going to turn on its axis if I go in my pajamas all day,” he said. “It’s Christmas.”</p><p>Leia playfully rolled her eyes. </p><p>Ben opened different presents, from Tai, from Phasma, Armie and Mitaka, from Aunt Qi’ra and Aunt Enfys and more. From Aunt Mara (who was at least trying to get to know her nephew more), from Uncle Luke (who probably wasn’t a complete asshole). There were clothes, books, movies, TV shows, everything. Mostly <em>Space Battles</em> themed. And in turn, Ben’s presents were generally well-received. They had to take the presents up, of course, and Ben took his chance to check AO3.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><div class="fic">
  <p class="fichead"><span class="redlinks">Dinner And A Show</span> by <span class="redlinks">DamnDameron</span> for <span class="redlinks"> AKnightofRen </span><br/><span class="tags">Space Battles Sequel Trilogy</span></p>
  <p class="date">25 December 2020</p>
  <p><b><span class="tags">No Archive Warnings Apply </span></b>, <span class="rtag">Kira/Jacen Starkiller</span>, <span class="tags">Alternate Universe - Modern Setting</span>, <span class="tags">Crack Treated Seriously</span>, <span class="tags">Christmas Dinner</span>, <span class="tags">Starkiller Family Drama</span>, <span class="tags">Jacen Starkiller Needs A Hug</span>, <span class="tags"> Angst and Humor </span></p>
  <p>For Christmas, Jacen invites Kira over to the Starkiller residence to have dinner with his family. What could possibly go wrong?</p>
  <p>Part <b>1</b> of <span class="graylinks">For My Knight</span></p>
  <p class="stats">Language: English Words: 500 Chapters: 1/1 Comments: <span class="graylinks">50</span> Kudos: <span class="graylinks">200</span> Hits: 15000</p>
</div><p>***</p><p><em>For my Knight</em>. Ben wouldn’t deny that it gave him pleasant shivers to see that. It was probably nothing, though; it was probably just a friendship thing. Poe being nice. </p><p>Even reading through the author’s notes where Poe thanked him for being a wonderful co-writer and fun to talk to and a good friend...well, the feeling of his heart racing didn’t quite abate. Or reading the fic itself, laughing in the right places at a certain turn of phrase, and smiling at the sweeter parts. Ben had to admit he felt cowed by the reviews that were already gushing over Poe’s work, but he kudosed and left a review there, thanking Poe profusely — maybe too profusely. </p><p>He thanked Poe again in the Google doc. </p><p><em>You’re welcome</em>, Poe wrote. <em>It was fun. You gave me a good prompt. <br/></em></p><p><b>I’m glad</b><em>, </em>Ben typed. </p><p>And later, putting up his work (“In Vino Veritas") and getting Poe outright enthusing over it and making a moodboard for it (that looked beautiful), Ben swore that that feeling of his heart racing didn’t go away. </p><p>It was just the Christmas spirit, he thought. He couldn’t be falling in love with Poe. You couldn’t fall in love with someone over the Internet — no matter what <em>You Got Mail</em> said.</p><p>Whatever it was, at least his Christmas break had been saved from disaster.  </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Here’s To 2021</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The new year rolls in, and with it, new developments.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Christmas break had temporarily derailed them, but as 2021 rolled around (and Ben was going back to school on January fifteenth), Ben and Poe got back on track. Well, sort of. Ben had to admit that he was sad about Christmas ending, and there was some stuff that really weighed on him, knowing that they were in a post-DOTF era. </p><p>Post-DOTF. To think that Ben had been excited about what the next movie would bring. True, TLJ had split the fandom down the middle mostly thanks to Kane’s characterization as well as, in some instances, people thinking Thrawn was trying to shove “SJW propaganda” down their throats. (Ben could only assume they slept through the Original Trilogy, which featured Nellith as a strong, capable woman) But it had meant something to Ben. It truly had. It had been innovative, playing with tropes. </p><p>DOTF just tried to please everyone, especially the antis that couldn’t stand the idea of a villain who wasn’t a mustache-twirler. And that Ben couldn’t allow. </p><p>***</p>
<p></p><div class="discord">
<p></p><div class="messagebody"><p><br/>
<span class="header"><span class="bighash">#</span> writers-discussion</span> <br/>
<br/>
</p><p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> So...people of the Kiralo Den, I started a co-write! </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">ChromeDome</span><br/>
<span class="text"> We know that, KoR. It’s been pretty much all you’ve talked about, you and DamnDameron. 😉 </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">TaiTai</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Well, I’m glad you’re doing better, at least. You were pretty upset when you left DOTF; I was pretty worried about you. </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Tai, he’s wonderful. He’s such a talented writer, just to begin with, and he’s kind, and he’s funny, and...fuck, I better stop right there. </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">TaiTai</span><br/>
<span class="text"> You like him? 🙂 </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> We’re just friends, Tai. Look, just to stop ChromeDome from ribbing me...can I DM you? </span></p><p>
      
    </p></div></div><p>***</p>
<p></p><div class="discord">
<p></p><div class="messagebody"><p><br/>
<span class="header"> <span class="">@</span> TaiTai</span> <br/>
<br/>
</p><p> <span class="name">TaiTai</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Sorry that Phas is giving you a hard time. She means well, but sometimes I think she goes overboard. </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> S’okay.<br/>
</span></p><p>
      <span class="text2"> You have any tips for...impressing him? </span>
    </p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">TaiTai</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Ben. For fuck’s sake, just be yourself. It’s clear from what I saw of him that he’s a nice person and he likes you. Don’t act like you need to perform some grand gesture to prove yourself. </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Yes. But. Tai. He’s charming and nice and I’m...me. </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name"> TaiTai</span><br/>
<span class="text"> A handsome, accomplished young man with a lot to live for? I can’t see why he wouldn’t fight for that.<br/>
</span></p><p>
      <span class="text2"> You could invite him to the Den. I see no reason why not. </span>
    </p>
<hr/></div></div><p>***</p><p>Tai was right. He could invite Poe there, to the Den. It was logging on to the Google doc that Ben had already copied and pasted the invite code.</p><p><strong> Poe, </strong> he typed, <strong> Do you want to come to the Den with me? </strong></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Today He Fucked Up</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which Ben acts rashly.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing. </p><p>Author’s Notes: Call this a triple update to practice my coding skills.</p><p>Also, warning for Nazi references (in the context of antis being antis) as well as past domestic abuse.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div class="discord">
<p></p><div class="messagebody"><p><br/>
<span class="header"><span class="bighash">#</span> general</span> <br/>
<br/>
</p><p><span class="welcome">￫ DamnDameron joined. You must construct additional pylons. </span></p><p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> You made it! :D </span></p>
<hr/><p> <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/>
<span class="text"> It was a relief to get your message. How about we take this over to vents? Not that I want to burden people on my first day. </span></p>
<hr/><p>  <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Sure! </span></p>
<hr/><p></p></div></div>***<div class="discord">
<p></p><div class="messagebody"><p><br/>
<span class="header"><span class="bighash">#</span> vent</span> <br/>
<br/>
</p><p> <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/>
<span class="text"> So yeah...let’s say I got a hate comment. It was on one of my old fics. You know, the one where Kira’s the fallen Jedi and Jacen’s the scavenger? </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>  <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Why? 😦 </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>  <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Well, for reference it was from some asshat called VicrulTheReaper, and it went on about how “your favorite Space Nazi” is dead and I should get over it and I should be happy with his arc in DOTF because canon. I was pretty polite to him but...yeah. Apparently some antis are going around under this guy calling himself RenTheLegendary. *Sighs* I’m not upset; I’m just confused. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>  <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Oh, really? No one talks to my friend like that! 🤬 </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>  <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/>
<span class="text"> It’s okay. I’m, like, twenty-three and a grad student. You don’t have to defend my honor or anything. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>  <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/>
<span class="text"> Yeah, but...you’re such a sweet person. And talented. And friendly. This Vicrul is just an immature idiot. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p></p></div></div>***<div class="tungle">
  <p class="tunglebody">

<span class="tungleurl">AKnightOfRen</span>

<span class="tungletext">
TFW when some asshat who can’t write slams your friend’s work: 
</span>


<span class="tungletags">
<span class="tungletag">#rants</span><span class="tungletag">#the knight speaks</span> <span class="tungletag">#fandom scumbags</span>
</span>

<span class="tunglenotes">
2,000 notes
</span>


</p>
</div>***<div class="window">
  <p class="topbar"></p>
  <p class="textfield">From: bensolo18@gmail.com</p>
  <p class="textfield">Subject: Am I The Asshole?</p>
  <p class="textfield">To: jersoandor@gmail.com</p>
</div><div class="ebody">
  <p>Hi, Doctor Erso,</p>
  <p>I really fucked up over winter break. Basically, I’m in this fandom that’s really toxic at times: people argue over shipping and such. There’s a troll going around being a dick, and...he targeted a guy who I made friends with. (We used to sort of be rivals, but we’re friends now) I blew up on Tumblr, and the guy I’m friends with...well, he’s not happy with me. He said I didn’t need to defend his honor, but he’s just such a nice person that I couldn’t just let the troll get to him. What’s wrong with me?</p>
  <p> See you in therapy, </p>
  <p> Ben </p>
</div><p class="buttonbar"></p><p>***</p><p>It was sending the email that Ben couldn’t help but feel a certain hollowness in his chest. Poe was mad. Ben couldn’t say he blamed him, and Tai had given him a (gentle) rebuke saying that Ben had poured not one, but two gallons of gasoline on the fire. </p><p>Poe. Somehow, the protectiveness he felt — it wasn’t just a protect-a-friend thing. There was something else. Probably a crush, though. There was no way he could tell Poe the truth. Especially when Poe likely thought of him as just a good friend. </p><p>Besides, Han and Leia had gotten better at the marriage thing, but Ben’s grandparents apparently hadn’t. Ben’s grandfather hadn’t been all bad; he’d genuinely loved Ben’s grandmother, but it hadn’t stopped him from treating her horribly at times, especially when he’d had too much to drink. It had culminated in a fight that turned physical and Anakin Skywalker being arrested — and Luke and Leia having to live with Padme’s friends, Bail and Breha. </p><p>(It probably explained why his uncle had issues, Ben thought)</p><p>When his mother had explained (the best she could) about what happened to Ben’s biological grandparents, Ben had been terrified of being abusive like his grandfather. His grandfather, who’d also gotten in trouble for being involved in criminal activities to provide for his family (Anakin had grown up in poverty). His grandfather, who’d loved — but love hadn’t been able to save him. </p><p>(Ben could still remember seeing Revenge of the Sith during his pre-TLJ Space Battles marathon, and Vader...well, Ben had had a panic attack even watching the scene where Vader Force Choked Senator Amidala.)</p><p>With that history, how was Ben Solo supposed to get in any sort of healthy relationship? </p><p>You couldn’t fall in love with someone on the Internet. It didn’t work that way. Not once, not ever. </p><p>***</p><p>“It sounds like this Vicrul struck a nerve with you.” Jyn said. </p><p>Ben sat in her office. It was a soothing place, packed with different books that Ben could imagine would be helpful to anyone who wanted to look. </p><p>“Yeah,” Ben said. “Doctor...I think there’s something else. I think I...have a crush on DamnDameron.”</p><p>“It’s 2021, Ben. You don’t have to be embarrassed.”</p><p>“Well, yes, but...he’s out of my league.” Ben said. "And you can’t fall in love with someone you meet over the Internet.”</p><p>Jyn raised an eyebrow. “Tinder and Grindr may beg to differ.”</p><p>“I think that’s a bad example, ma’am.” Ben sighed. “But he’s so wonderful. It’s like...after DOTF, I was so devastated, but it’s like being around P — DamnDameron...it’s like it makes me happy. He makes me happy. And now he’s mad at me because I blew up at Vicrul on Tumblr, and...yeah.”</p><p>“You could talk to him,” Jyn said. “Ben...just apologize to him. Say you made a mistake. Making mistakes isn’t a sign of being a bad person — even if people on Tumblr think so.”</p><p>“I guess they do.” The Sam/Kira shippers had really torn into Kira for being tricked by the Supreme Leader, calling her a cocktease and Space Bella Swan and such. It was frustrating, especially since Kira wasn’t trying to lead Sam on. It wasn’t like Kira was a Nice Guy’s worst nightmare. </p><p>“He sounds good for you, DamnDameron,” Jyn said. “The way you talk about him...it’s clear you think highly of him, even if you’re not in love.”</p><p>“I do.” Ben sighed. “Doctor, I wouldn’t know being in love if it bit me.”</p><p>“The best you can do is apologize to him. And...take it slow, Ben. Life isn’t a Disney movie. And given your family history...it’s understandable that you have a degree of trauma involving the idea of relationships.”</p><p>Ben nodded. “I’m scared of being like him. I’m scared of being an abuser.”</p><p>“I doubt it. Even people who are children of abusers don’t grow up to be that way. It’s not set in stone.” Jyn smiled at him. “Ben...what if you did homework involving figuring out what relationships mean to you? Not just romantic, but platonic, familial. Journal about them.”</p><p>“Worth a shot.” Ben said.</p><p>***</p><p>He apologized to Poe later. Poe seemed to have cooled off, and admitted he was more worried for Ben than angry. Ben was glad, at least. There was something freeing, he thought, about knowing Poe wasn’t angry at him. </p><p>They were still working on their co-write. Mostly the sections where Jacen had rescued Kira from Jakku, along with her parents, and he and Kira were getting to know each other. It was going well. Ben found, once he and Poe completed the latest chapter and posted it, that —</p><p>
  <i> Kira is so much like Poe here. </i>
</p><p>There had been a moment, where Ben had looked at the chapter, at the banter and laughter, and he wondered if Poe noticed that he was almost modeling it on them. </p><p>Then again, method-writing, right? They had to draw on what they knew, somehow. Kira and Jacen had to start off friends first. Right? </p><p>Ben sighed and flopped on the bed in his childhood bedroom. He wondered, if, in a way, he had more in common with Jacen Starkiller than he thought.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. New Year, New Start</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ben goes back to school.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p></p><div class="discord">
  <p> </p>
  <p></p>
  <div class="messagebody">
    <p>
      <br/>
      <span class="header"><span class="">@</span>DamnDameron</span>
      
      <br/>
      <br/>
    </p>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> I have school tomorrow. I don’t wanna go. </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/><span class="text"> Ben. Ren-bird. Whether you like it or not, you have to go to school. </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> Figured that. I just thought...I mean, I just don’t like my college very much. It’s like people travel in packs there. </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/><span class="text"> I’ll help. I’ll at least be moral support. </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> That’s good, at least. Thanks. I guess it’ll be weird after last year. </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name"> DamnDameron </span><br/><span class="text"> Which part? </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> Any of it. </span></p>
    <hr/>
  </div>
</div><p>***</p><p>“You’ll be fine,” Phasma said even as Ben got in her car. Not that Ben couldn’t drive, but he trusted her judgment. “Really. I mean, you’ve got me.”</p><p>“Yeah, well, I don’t see you outside of your classes.”</p><p>“Still.” A beat. “How are things with your boyfriend?”</p><p>Usually, Ben would shrug it off, but it seemed that Phasma’s comments were getting a bit accurate.</p><p>“How did you know you liked Armie?” Ben said.</p><p>A shrug from Phasma. “I just did. I thought he was handsome, witty, strong in his way especially considering that thing he had to live with...and when you really got to know him, the prickliness was just an act. I got to know him. And from there, well...”</p><p>“So it’s a ‘just doing’ thing.” Ben sighed as he spoke. “Phas, what if I end up like my grandfather?”</p><p>“You won’t,” Phasma said. "I know you’re not perfect, but you’re doing the best you can. You’re going to therapy. Stuff like that. I might tease you, Ben, but...if you did end up happy with DamnDameron, I’d call that a victory.”</p><p>Ben smiled despite himself. “That’s good. At least.”</p><p>***</p><p>The university was busy. Ben could definitely say that. Even watching the others walk about and chat with each other, Ben said, “Is there any reason they have to travel in packs?”</p><p>Phasma shrugged. “No idea. There’s probably some neuroscientific study that explains college students traveling in packs. And having awful volume control.”</p><p>Ben sighed. “You are so much like my mother.”</p><p>”Some stuff transcends generations. Lack of tolerance for noise being one of them.”</p><p>Ben supposed he couldn’t argue with that. </p><p>They went their separate ways when the alarms they’d set on their phones went off. Ben sighed. “Hopefully this essay-writing class won’t be as bad as last time.”</p><p>”It’s a new year and a new start, Ben. What could possibly go wrong?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Voe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ben’s first day of class doesn’t go well.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Professor Gabriel Ren was pretty well-covered-up when Ben first got into his class. Ren, Ben thought. It almost sounded like that RenTheLegendary asshole who was going around harassing people like Poe. </p><p>No, that was ridiculous. Anyone could be anyone behind a screen, but what were the odds that a college professor was harassing grad students who didn’t even go to Hosnia University on Tumblr, of all places? It would be the twist to a cheesy fanfic or something like that.</p><p>Even as he gave the ground rules and the syllabus, Ben looked over at the girl whose pale blond hair was tied in braids, wearing a Space Battles T-shirt. Huh. A kindred spirit, he couldn’t help but think. Not everyone was really familiar with Space Battles, at least in high school. </p><p>She seemed lost in thought, at least. Making notes on her phone. At least before Professor Ren had them share their essay topics. Ben had to make up his on the spot — making it about Kiralo, and Voe about racism and misogyny in fandom. </p><p>“You do know Kiralo’s a toxic ship, right?” Voe said. </p><p><em>Oh, fuck, here we go... “</em>I got into it thanks to <em>The Last Jedi</em>, for your information,” Ben said. </p><p>“Well, yes, but he wasn’t very nice to her there either.” Voe deepened her voice a bit in imitation of Kylo. “ ‘I’m Kylo and I’m treating you like shit because I’m a spoiled rich kid and you had to worry about where your next meal’s coming from. Wanna join the Dark Side?’”</p><p>”He wasn’t spoiled,” Ben protested. “I mean, it’s not like having Aldric in his head was exactly an idyllic existence. Or having his uncle try and, y’know, murder him!”</p><p>”Fine, before that.”</p><p>”As entertaining as this discussion is,” Professor Ren said, “Other people want to share their topics.”</p><p>That stupid bastard’s eyes were practically twinkling. Ben sighed. “Fine by me.”</p><p>The others shared their topics, and Ben swore that it was basically that last essay writing class all over again. </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p></p><div class="discord">
  <p> </p>
  <p> </p>
  <p></p>
  <div class="messagebody">
    <p><br/><span class="header"><span class="">@</span>DamnDameron</span> <br/><br/></p>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. I should be working on my collab with you, but I’m just so angry. </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/><span class="text"> Want to talk about it? </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> There’s an anti in my class. And the teacher...I swear he embarrassed me in front of everyone. </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">DamnDameron</span><br/><span class="text"> Well, shit. You know, I could write something for you? I mean, maybe make it Kiralo?</span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> Huh. Interesting. Who’d be the shipper and who’d be the anti? </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name"> DamnDameron </span><br/><span class="text"> Kira’s the shipper, Kylo’s the anti. 😂 </span></p>
    <hr/>
    <p> <span class="name">AKnightofRen</span><br/><span class="text"> Very...almost canon of you. 😂 </span></p>
    <hr/>
  </div>
</div><p>***</p><p></p><div class="fic">
  <p class="fichead"><span class="redlinks">Enemies To Lovers</span> by <span class="redlinks">DamnDameron</span> for <span class="redlinks"> AKnightofRen </span><br/><span class="tags">Space Battles Sequel Trilogy</span></p>
  <p class="date">15 January 2021</p>
  <p><b><span class="tags">No Archive Warnings Apply</span></b>, <span class="rtag">Kylo Ren/Kira</span>, <span class="rtag">Kira/Jacen Starkiller</span>, <span class="rtag"> Kira/Jacen Starkiller | Kylo Ren </span>, <span class="tags">Alternate Universe - Fans &amp; Fandom</span>, <span class="tags">Slow Burn</span>, <span class="tags">Kira’s A Shipper</span>, <span class="tags">Kylo’s An Anti</span>, <span class="tags">Crack Treated Seriously</span></p>
  <p>After the release of Space Conflict, Episode IX: Duel of the Fates, Kira Solana is left devastated by how the film treated the heroine, Steela, and her relationship with the villain, Matt. While working on her own fix-it for Duel of the Fates, she meets a boy in her college class, Jacen, who heatedly opposes Matt/Steela. Can the two of them find common ground?</p>
  <p>Part <b>2</b> of <span class="graylinks">For My Knight</span></p>
  <p class="stats">Language: English Words: 1,000 Chapters: 1/? Comments: <span class="graylinks">50</span> Kudos: <span class="graylinks">100</span> Hits: 1500</p>
</div>***<p>Ben clicked on the link and began to read.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Enemies To Lovers, Chapter One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which we get a glimpse of the fic Poe wrote for Ben.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Disclaimer: I own nothing.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <h2 class="title heading">Enemies To Lovers</h2><h4>DamnDameron</h4><h3 class="anh">Summary:</h3><p class="fakenotes">After the release of Space Conflict, Episode IX: Duel of the Fates, Kira Solana is left devastated by how the film treated the heroine, Steela, and her relationship with the villain, Matt. While working on her own fix-it for Duel of the Fates, she meets a boy in her college class, Jacen, who heatedly opposes Matt/Steela. Can the two of them find common ground?</p>
<h3 class="anh">Notes:</h3><p class="fakenotes">For <span class="u"> AKnightOfRen. </span></p><p class="fakenotes">Hey, everyone, DamnDameron here. I know that AKnightOfRen and I are working on our WIP, but I figured that I’d write something because he had a rough day. Hope this makes you feel better, Ren-bird!</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<h3>Chapter 1: The Enemies</h3><p>It was walking into the class proper that Kira Solana couldn’t help but feel like she was in a dream. </p><p>It was odd, being back at Core Worlds University after winter break — when she’d seen <em>Space Battles, Episode IX: Duel of the Fates</em>. It was something that her friend Lily had tried to warn her about, telling her to stick to fic and whatnot, but Kira had felt obligated to stick around, see how Steela Niima’s story played out, and Matthew Sunrider’s. </p><p>She hadn’t expected the story to all but shit on so many characters. </p><p>There was a boy in the class. Blond haired, clearly absorbed in his phone, typing up something. The great American novel? Maybe, Kira thought. She sat down, beginning to type out the next chapter of her fic that was intended to fix Matt’s characterization, Brent Sidious’ incompetence be damned. </p><p>She could swear that the boy was looking at her out of the corner of his eye. Watchful, curious. Kira was about to tell him off, to tell him to go back to his phone when he said, “I don’t mean to bother you, but I really like your shirt.”</p><p>”What? Oh.” Kira had almost forgotten that she was wearing that Space Conflict shirt that her foster mother, Missy, had gotten her for Christmas. God bless Missy; she meant well. She really did. Even if she thought Kira took MattSteela too seriously. ”Thanks.”</p><p>”No problem. What did you think of the last movie?” </p><p><em>Bloody hell... “</em>It was...I liked the last one better.”</p><p>”I can see that,” the boy said. “I thought stuff like what they did with the General was...weird.”</p><p>Kira laughed. “You’re telling me. I’m Kira, by the way.”</p><p>”Jacen,” Jacen said. He sounded almost shy. </p><p>***</p><p>It was when the professor was going over the syllabus and talking about topics that Kira swore that her heart was all but threatening to go into overdrive, and all when she was a senior in college at that. “I was thinking of Matt/Steela,” she said. “How it creates a safe space for women.”</p><p>The others snickered, and Kira swore that she felt her face flush. </p><p>”Space Conflict isn’t a YA novel,” Jacen said. “Did you forget Matt tortured her?”</p><p>”I watched the movies, you arrogant wanker! And furthermore, I don’t need some guy policing what I write and read. If I wanted that, I’d go on Reddit.”</p><p>Jacen shrugged. “Whatever you say.”</p><p>”Enough,” the Professor said sternly. “This isn’t Tumblr.”</p><p>She probably meant well. It didn’t keep Kira from feeling like she wanted to be swallowed up by the floor. The best consolation she had, she thought, was that at least she’d find a way to show Jacen Starkiller up. </p><p class="bline"> 
<a class="button" href="#main"><span class="topb"></span></a>
<a class="button" href=""><span class="kudosb"></span></a>
<a class="button" href=""><span class="collectionb"></span></a>
<a class="button" href=""><span class="bookmarkb"></span></a>
<a class="button" href="http://archiveofourown.org/comments/show_comments?work_id=YOUR_WORK_ID_HERE"><span class="commentsb"></span></a>
</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>